Meet the
beautiful Roberta Lauren Finque, the little-known alter-ego of Bob Finkand
while you're at it, don't forget to pet her electric blue poodle,
Cheri Soufflé. Roberta Lauren is a follicly challenged but
fastidious woman who leaves her wig and poodle at Elizabeth Arden's
salon at Saks each and every Wednesday for a wash, set and
electric blue tinting. And Cheri Soufflé doesn't seem to mind a
bit! Or at least that's Roberta Lauren's story . . . I haven't
heard Cheri Soufflé's side of it yet. Click on the picture to
see a larger version, or check out what
Bob actually looked like before I gave him this darling
makeover. And remember, if there's just one lesson you should
learn from this portrait gallery, it's this: Don't ever
let me get my hands on a photograph of you. There's no telling what
I might do to it.
And
yet, if I'm feeling very generous I might merely lacquer you in a
classy combination of gold leaf and green tinfoil and turn you
into a glitterboy. This is Frank Episale, who is terribly fond of
black and white and greyscale, and who thereby tempted me to
color him in. It's very important to have colors in your life.
Click the picture for a larger version, or visit him on the web
at Frank's Foyer.
This is my first publicly accessible self-portrait
that's based on an actual photograph of me. The photograph was
taken when I was in high school, on the day I got glasses for the
first time. The glasses seem to have mostly faded out of the
final artwork, but you can see a little hint of them if you look
closely enough. Also, I like the fact that the swirls look like
hair. However, my actual hair looks nothing like that at all.